


Happy New Fear

by ItsAJ_B1tches, Jenicorn, venom_for_free



Series: Lying To Myself [3]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! - All Media Types, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: M/M, New Year's Eve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 09:30:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17241770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItsAJ_B1tches/pseuds/ItsAJ_B1tches, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jenicorn/pseuds/Jenicorn, https://archiveofourown.org/users/venom_for_free/pseuds/venom_for_free
Summary: It's New Year's eve.Yami and Kaiba deal with their loneliness, but they choose very different paths.*This oneshot is part of the Lying To Myself universe and as such,might not make as much sense without first reading that.*





	Happy New Fear

**Author's Note:**

> This oneshot takes place between chapter 6 and chapter 7 of Lying To Myself.  
> It could be read alone but it might not make as much sense.  
> Enjoy!

23:21

Kaiba stared at the tiny letters on the bottom right corner of his laptop.

When had it gotten so late?

 

As he looked up, he saw Mokuba asleep on his sofa, Kaiba’s big coat draped over him like the most dramatic blanket.

 

_Shit._

He had promised his brother to spend the evening together, but his own clogged head had riled up so much work for him, that he had lost all track of time.  

 

23:24

Yami stepped into the bar and hated himself the second his shoes touched the dark wooden floor.

 

Why was he here?

He didn’t know.

 

Everyone around him was obnoxiously loud, drunk, or both.

Why had he decided to go out alone? He was invited to multiple parties.

 

All of his friends probably had an amazing time. But they were scattered over Domino, and he didn’t want to pick sides.

 

Moreover, he had wanted one evening to himself to think about all the things that had happened in the last few days.

 

23:25

Mokuba stirred in his sleep, probably sensing that he was watched.

Kaiba ripped his eyes from his brother, forcing himself to focus on the reports once again.

 

Why had he put all work aside to visit Yami?

Why was he unable to concentrate for one hot second?

Whenever he closed his eyes, there was him, taunting, humiliating, _dominating._

 

His stomach churned again and Kaiba willed himself to believe, _forced_ himself to believe, that it was elicited by a lack of food.

 

_When did I eat the last meal? I don’t even feel hunger anymore. At least, not for food. What am I? A lovesick teenager?_

 

23:32

“Hey beauty, are you here often?”

 

_Wow, so original!_

Yami wanted to puke. Next, he was going to ask if he fell from heaven.

 

“Shit, I need to call god, he’s missing-“

 

Yami got up and left.

All his willpower manifested into the act of NOT slapping the other man, he had no energy left for an answer. Or worse, more comments.

 

The other man got up, too. He followed Yami around the bar, positioning himself next to the small man. “Why are you here if you don’t want to flirt?”

 

His slight slur disgusted Yami. But the question was fair. Why exactly was he here?

 

_Because you need to get some new thoughts into your head, you fucking idiot._

 

His blues had almost ruined Christmas. The days after weren’t exactly easier.

He spent an unholy amount of time staring at his phone, waiting for a reply. Yugi had teased him about it ruthlessly. Then, Kaiba had actually called him, but managed to piss him off even more.

 

_I needed to get my mind back on track._

 

That was his plan, that was, why he was here.

 

The taller man ogled him from above.

_He wasn’t even ugly. I should have looked at him before I got up._

_I bet those long legs would wrap nicely around my hips when I –_

 

He realised he wasn’t thinking about the legs of the man in front of him. Turning on his heels with a glare, Yami left again.

 

23:38

Kaiba caught himself staring at Mokuba again.

His brother wasn’t a child anymore. By now, he had reached the age Kaiba was at, when he took over the giant imperium.

 

His brother on the other hand was supposed to live a normal life. Sure, he was vice president, and Kaiba often asked him about his opinions, but he was supposed to finish school before he would be employed seriously.

 

In moments like this, Kaiba envied him a lot. He got to sleep instead of working on the night of new years eve.

 

_Maybe if I hadn’t been forced to take responsibility for a billion-dollar organisation as a teenager, I wouldn’t get hard at the idea of a mere stranger taking control of me!_

 

_Wow_

_-_ he stopped himself mid rant-

_where did that come from?_

 

 **He** had been the one who wanted this control. Control he never had before. _Why give it away now?_ His body responded with two very confusing actions- his hands started to tremble, and his dick got semi hard.

 

_Fuck. Not right here. Not right now. Not with Mokuba._

 

23:43

After walking around aimlessly for some time, Yami found himself at the bar again. Normally, he wouldn’t drink. It clouded his senses, and he needed those. But everyone around him was unbearable.

 

Was a quick shag to forget someone worth all this trouble?

 

The barkeeper glanced up at him, a twinkle in his eyes and a smirk playing around his lips.

 

Yami smiled back. He sat down on the bar stool again and ordered.

_This man was attractive._

The way he smiled made Yami feel warm and he was half sure not all of it was caused by alcohol.

 

Yami leaned forward and studied the hazel coloured bangs covering the other man’s blue eyes.

No.

His eyes weren’t blue.

They were green.

And his hair wasn’t hazel, it was dark brown.

 

Yami grabbed the drink, muttered an angered “Thank you.”, payed and left.

 

Why was he here?

He hated to be surrounded by so many people.

 

23:51

Kaiba pinched the bridge of his nose.

The report in front of him was terribly written and riddled with mistakes.

 

He knew, people weren’t exactly eager to work during the holidays. But if they kept offering him this crap, they wouldn’t need to next year. At least not as an employee at KaibaCorp.

 

He wouldn’t dare to produce anything mediocre.

As soon as he got a task, he’d do his job perfectly.

 

Of course, if he didn’t screw up by forgetting to call.

This was so dumb. He was dumb.

Why had this happened?

 

Yami would have given him an immediate appointment!

 

But he screwed up and now, he was sitting here at his desk, thinking about the magnetic dominus, and trying to will down his erection before the fireworks would inevitably wake his brother.

 

He could have been with Yami.

Why was he here?

He hated to feel so alone.

 

23:58

Yami had given up.

Everyone and everything reminded him of Kaiba.

He accepted it, trying to choose someone with the smallest resemblance.

 

As he stumbled forward to the restrooms, another young man caught him.

He had cheekbones almost as high as Kaibas, but Yami didn’t care anymore.

 

If the real Kaiba hadn’t bothered calling him for a week, he’d find someone else.

 

Grabbing the other man at the collar, he kissed him.

Hard.

 

As the other one went tense, then soft, then hard, Yami smirked to himself.

He hadn’t lost his charm.

 

Sober Yami would hate him for that.

He was kissing a stranger. Not that he hadn’t had one night stands before, but normally, he’d _ask_ his partners first.

Now, he was shoving himself against the other man, all thoughts about decent attire buried under the need to feel, to forget.

 

He was lucky, instead of losing some of his teeth, the other man seemed to be really into it.

 

Yami dragged him to the restroom, his consciousness nagging at him, that he was making a terrible mistake.  

23:59

The first fireworks went off premature.

But now, so close to midnight, the sound of explosions grew louder and louder.

 

Mokuba woke up, startled at the sound and at the fact he’d fallen asleep.

Peeling open his eyes, he didn’t dare to believe them at first.

 

His older brother stood flush against the giant windows, palms pressed up at the glass. For a second, he looked like a child seeing the first snow.

 

Kaiba himself wasn’t sure what he was doing. He had seen this, year after year. But now, standing at the floor length windows, seeing the sky light up in front of him, he was suddenly reminded about being alive.

 

Staring down into the city, he wondered if Yami was out there.

 

A noise from behind took him by surprise.

Mokuba had woken up and walked over.

 

“Happy new year, Nii-sama.”

 

The older one smiled, a soft expression solely reserved for his brother.

“Happy new year.”

 

They both watched the fireworks in piece.

 

“Do you have any resolutions?”

 

Kaiba thought about it. There was a lot he intended to do this year, but as he stared at the red and yellow lights against the dark night sky, only one thought dominated his head.

 

He couldn’t tell Mokuba. He couldn’t.

 

“Resolutions are for cowards who don’t dare to realise their goals immediately.”

 

Never had he felt so hollow.

 

00:00

Yami slammed against the wall of the bathroom stall.

 

Kissing, groping, biting fiercely, he held on the other man for dear life.

He didn’t care about being gentle or careful today.

 

He wanted to break and be broken.

Clinging to the other man’s shirt, he started to lower his hands to his waistband.

 

He started to stroke the noticeable bulge underneath the clothes, lips not stopping to tease willing flesh.

 

Yami’s fingers moved expertly to the other one’s fly. He had no time to waste.

But the button on top was obscured by a belt.

 

Rolling his eyes, he let go of the other one’s lips to see where to guide his hands. And froze in shock.

 

Underneath his fingertips glinted a silver, rectangular buckle, obviously imprinted with the initials of a person he tried **_so hard_** to forget.

 

The man in front of him apparently misread his shock.

 

“Oh my god you know what this stands for, right?”, he shrieked happily, obviously glad to have found someone sharing his passion.

 

Yami wanted to die. He tried to silence the other man with a kiss, but he smiled through it, just babbling again after he broke the kiss.

 

“He’s such an icon! He is everything you could want, the whole package! Smart, sexy and rich! His perfectly coiffed hair! His mesmerizing eyes! Isn’t he the sexiest person you have ever seen?”

 

Yami just stood there, frozen into absolute silence and rigidity.

 

“I’d sell my soul just to touch him once! You think he likes men? Because I couldn’t handle him dating a woman. But I couldn’t handle him dating any other man either, I guess!”

 

The uncomfortable tightening in his stomach woke Yami from his stupor.

He growled, then continued to shove his no longer needed assistance off of him and left the bar in a hurry.

 

As he walked through Domino, he could see all the other people celebrate and dance, welcoming the new year.

 

He buried himself deeper in his scarf. His friends were all having the time of their lives, but he was roaming the streets like a lonely wild animal.

 

Before he knew where he went, he stood in front of the Kaiba Corporations tower. The glass panels reflected the fireworks like a mirror and Yami stood there, looking up.

 

He could have sworn that he saw movement in the higher levels of the tower, but he was drunk and had normally functioning eyes instead of eagle ones.

 

Smiling sadly to himself, he tried his best to feel less pathetic.

But the comments from the stranger in the bar kept creeping back.

 

Yami decided, that he **_would_ **touch Kaiba in the new year.

And that he wouldn’t stop there.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Happy New Year everyone!!
> 
> We hope you all have a great day and enjoy it.  
> We wish you the best for the New Year and hope you will continue to follow us!  
> Find us on Tumblr: Ajenomi.
> 
> Also as always great thanks to our editor prettiugli, who deals with us and our groupchat.


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